Miracle Distribution Center - A Course in Miracles Resource Center

What's Our Niche?

With the recent announcement by Billy Graham that his latest worldwide crusade would be his last, the media has been speculating about his successor. Many remember that Billy Graham rose to fame in the 50's as the evangelist of choice who rubbed shoulders with presidents and world leaders. Scholars monitoring the U.S. religious scene say that no one currently preaching seems likely to take over as the "nation's pastor." But that doesn't stop the hunt.

Scholar Randall Balmer, professor of American Religion at Columbia University, calls the new approach to evangelism "niche evangelism." He says, "The analogy would be the transition from network TV to cable, where you have this extraordinary fracturing of audiences and people stepping up to speak to each particular audience." So you have Texas evangelist Joel Osteen relating to a suburban self-help genre, Bill Hybels' Willow Creek ministry in Chicago speaking the language of corporate culture, Greg Laurie with his Harvest Crusades in southern California packing an easy-going style to appeal to the surf crowd (along with his motocross-and-rock nights to attract the youth) and Rick Warren, southern California pastor who has found a more diverse audience through his mega best selling book, The Purpose Driven Life.

Who is going to be the next biggest and best? Isn't it interesting how the world finds value? Whoever sells the most books, has the highest rated TV show or gets the biggest numbers at their crusade, must be the one with the best answer for our ailing world.

I wonder how Jesus would stack up with today's standards. From what history tells us, Jesus didn't have a very "successful" ministry. He didn't have much of a following --twelve kind of so-so followers, who ended up abandoning him. Crowds would sometimes show up and they always wanted to eat. He didn't have a best selling book -- well, at least not yet. And he certainly didn't speak exclusively to any one niche. Guess he missed the memo on that one!

Jesus probably would not have been in the running for evangelist of the year, but his message is what every evangelist is hanging his hopes on. The true message of Jesus was and is one of inclusive love that cuts across all niches. It is not one that stresses success in the world, but peace in your heart. Does that mean we cannot have success in the world? Certainly not! But unless we have peace in our hearts and live from that peace in our lives, no success in this world will give us what we want.

A Course in Miracles cautions us that we cannot evaluate how we are doing in our growth when it says, "Some of your greatest advances you have judged as failures, and some of your deepest retreats you have evaluated as success." (T383) So we really don't know what is best for us and neither does someone else. There is no person out there who has the answer for you. Every true teaching points us back to ourselves.

Jesus tells us that the Kingdom of God is within. It is not in a spiritual community, a best selling book or the teaching of any self-proclaimed expert. If a teaching or "teacher" is expressing that they have the "right" way or "pure" way, you might want to take the highway! No one can do the work of our spiritual growth for us and there are no short cuts. We are going to have to sit down with ourselves and stop, look and listen.

My son, Jeffrey, just finished kindergarten. It was fun to watch his wonder and excitement over the little seed in the cup and the snail and his belly foot. He loves to stop, look and listen. He doesn't care if it seems like (to Mom) he is taking hours to study something. He enjoys the process. How many of us are enjoying the process?

When I travel around lecturing or even in our weekly study groups, I always hear the same thing: I started the Course and the Workbook lessons but I stopped doing them. The reasons given for stopping were pretty much the same: they forgot to do the lessons, they didn't have time or they didn't think they were understanding them. If my son gave me those excuses in regards to his homework, my response would be, "Well, you need to make an effort to remember, make the time to do it and ask for help if you need it. Because you MUST do it."

And, that is pretty much my answer to those who are complaining about what a mess their lives are, but they have not done the Workbook lessons or have put the Course down. Think of it. We have wonderful truths and lessons given to us from Jesus to help us heal our lives. Everyday we can practice a new gem. Why would we not want to make every effort possible to do it?

Jesus is so much more patient and understanding than I would be with my own child. If we forget our lesson, he does not get mad at us, but simply says start again. If we push the Course aside because we don't feel we have the time, he simply waits for us to start again. And, if we don't understand, he has given us a Teacher in the Holy Spirit that is available to us 24/7 for free!

It is time for us to dig in with the same excitement about learning as that of a kindergartener. We are told in the Course that it is but one path in the universal curriculum and that we all must take a course in love whether it be this form of it or another. Why MUST we? Because love is our essence, it is the truth about us. We spend so little time embracing our true essence and living from it, and that is why we feel so overwhelmed, confused, stressed and frustrated. That is not the life God intended for us to experience.

So let's stop griping over who has the right interpretation, right version or biggest crowd -- that's the stuff of the world. It is time for us to roll up our sleeves and start doing the work of forgiveness and love.

The Course is set up as a self-study program -- just look at the book. We don't need to wait for a teacher to come to us before we can begin the Course or do it "right," but rather we need to recognize the Teacher that is within us now. There are people who can help us along the way, but the function of every true teacher, according to the Course, is "to give his students so much of his own learning that they will one day no longer need him." We are told that the goal of the Course is to absolve us of the need for a teacher. "This is the opposite of the ego oriented teacher's goal." (T54)

We will not know if we are doing the Course "right" by what the world shows us but rather by how we feel in the midst of what the world is showing us. In the Course we read, "How can you know whether you chose the stairs to Heaven or the way to hell? Quite easily. How do you feel? Is peace in your awareness? Are you certain which way you go? And are you sure the goal of Heaven can be reached? If not, you walk alone. Ask, then, your Friend [Holy Spirit] to join with you and give you certainty of where you go." (T494)

As parents, we try to give our children the values they need to handle the world on their own. We hope that we have taught them well enough that they won't give into peer pressure -- that they will live from their own values. Well, then we must teach by example and not give into what the world says is valuable, but hold fast to what God tells us is true value -- the peace that does pass all worldly understanding.

I have told the following Chinese Taoist story many times. It illustrates the changing nature of the world and how we cannot look to the world for affirmation of success or failure.

There is a story of a farmer whose only horse ran away. That evening the neighbors gathered to commiserate with him since this was such bad luck. "Your farm will suffer, and you cannot plow," they said. "Surely this is a terrible thing to have happened to you."
He said, "Maybe yes, maybe no."
The next day the horse returned but brought with it six wild horses, and the neighbors came to congratulate him and exclaim at his good fortune. "You are richer than you were before!" they said. "Surely this has turned out to be a good thing for you, after all."
He said, "Maybe yes, maybe no."
And then, the following day, his son tried to saddle and ride one of the wild horses. He was thrown and broke his leg, and he couldn't work on the farm. Again the neighbors came to offer their sympathy for the incident. There is more work than only you can handle, and you may be driven poor," they said. "Surely this is a terrible misfortune."
The old farmer said, "Maybe yes, maybe no."
The day after that, conscription officers came to the village to seize young men for the army, but because of his broken leg the farmer's son was rejected. When the neighbors came again, they said, "How fortunate! Things have worked out after all. Most young men never return alive from the war. Surely this is the best of fortunes for you!"
And the old man said, "Maybe yes, maybe no."

The Course always points us back to our own internal Teacher for help. It tells us that the Holy Spirit is evaluative. He sorts out the true from the false in our minds by teaching us how to look at every thought that enters our minds in the light of what God put there. "Whatever is in accord with this light He retains, to strengthen the Kingdom in you. Whatever is partly in accord with it He accepts and purifies. But what is out of accord entirely He rejects." (T109)

Success in the world is constantly changing, but the Holy Spirit simply looks through the complexities of the world to the truth. He helps us sorts through our confused thinking, much the way a trusted friend might help us sort through an overflowing closet . . . "This thought looks good on you. Let's keep it. That one needs some mending. This one does not suit you at all. It needs to go." That is the Holy Spirit's niche -- sorting through your judgments and fears to heal your life. But, for Him to fill his niche, we must fill our niche. We need to stop the endless search outside ourselves. It is time for us to stop and look at our lives right here, right now -- and listen. His answer is waiting for our willingness to hear It -- and only It.

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Tuning to the Truth

The other day, my husband was driving in my car with me and I turned on the radio to one of my favorite AM stations. He asked me how I could listen to that station with all the static on it. That station has never come in very well in my car so I have just tolerated it. I had gotten so used to the static. I didn't even notice it anymore.

"The ego depends solely on your willingness to tolerate it." (T178)

It hit me that this story is really a metaphor for life. We have gotten so used to the "static" of life -- the fear, anger, frustration, judgments, feelings of worthlessness, depression, etc., that we don't even think there can be another way. We lament about politics, war, gas prices, global warming and who is and is not responsible for all these issues. We chew on this side of the problem and then that side of the problem, but like a useless piece of gristle, it needs to be spit out -- and not tolerated anymore.

"You who identify with your ego cannot believe God loves you." (T61)

We tolerate the pain, suffering and problems of life because we don't think we deserve anything else. We don't realize that there is another station transmitting clearly an alternative to our pathetic opinion. It is time we tune into the truth. We have made a mistake about who we are. A Course in Miracles would tell each of us that we are God's holy child, we are the light of the world, we are the Kingdom of Heaven, but we have let a belief in darkness enter our minds and so we need to be reminded of who we are.

Like the story of the prodigal son, we feel we have left our Father's home for what we thought the world could offer us. Now the world and all its problems seem very real to us and we find it hard to believe that our loving Father would accept us back after we have forsaken Him for the world. And yet, like the prodigal son, when we come Home to our Father (when we turn to Him), He welcomes us with open arms. For to God, we have never forsaken Him or left Him -- we were always with Him.

When our son Jeffrey was about three, he went through the stage where he would wander away from us. At that age kids are exerting their will and often go in the direction they want, even if the parent says no. One time my husband Paul let Jeffrey wander away in hopes of teaching him a lesson. Instead of immediately going after him, Paul watched from a distance. When Jeffrey thought he was all alone, he began to cry. Paul quickly appeared to him. Even though Paul told Jeffrey he was always watching him and Paul was with him now, Jeffrey still continued to cry. It took Jeffrey a while to finally be comforted.

We think we have wandered away from God's love and care. Yet we have never left God's awareness. The moment that we are willing to identify with the truth of who we are, we will know ourselves again. But just as Jeffrey was still afraid and crying after he was found, so we often feel lost in this world even though God is holding us. We need to remove the barriers that we have built up against His love and presence in our lives.

"What you believe is true for you. In this sense the separation has occurred, and to deny it is merely to use denial inappropriately. However, to concentrate on error is only a further error. The initial corrective procedure is to recognize temporarily that there is a problem, but only as an indication that immediate correction is needed." (T32)

The Course tells us that the ego is nothing more than a mistaken thought. It is a thought that we could be separate from God, from His safety and love. But even though it is nothing, we have made its nothingness seem pretty real. The world with all its devastation and beauty . . . our bodies with all their strengths and frailties. . . and our relationships with all their challenges and opportunities -- they are all reflections of the thought of separation -- of our egos.

It would make no sense to deny this world or its effects on us, since we still believe in their reality, and A Course in Miracles does not ask us to do this. Instead it asks us to look straight at every event, situation or person who causes us pain and tune into the truth instead of the illusion. The Course tells us, "The best defense, as always, is not to attack another's position, but rather to protect the truth." (T36) We will never escape from our suffering by denying that we think we are these physical bodies or by ignoring the things of the world. But, by focusing on the truth in every situation, we will be placing our attention on love, which is our Source and the only thing that can transcend this illusory world.

When Jeffrey was just learning to walk, he would pull himself up by our black lacquer piano. He would move all around that big piece of furniture leaving little handprints all over the place. Before Jeffrey came into our lives I never would have tolerated a smudge or mark on our beautiful piano. But now I didn't see those handprints as distractions to the beauty of the piano but rather as what made the piano beautiful. Those little marks reminded me of love. Oh, I cleaned the piano, but now I did it in gratitude for the life of the one who made those marks.

Perhaps there are people or situations in your life that have made an unpleasant mark. You will never heal those situations by denying them or attacking them, but only by transforming them in love. The key to healing is where we place our focus -- what we are tuning in to. Unless we embrace this truth of who we are and who they are, we will continue the world of pain and suffering.

"The ego's opposite in every way, we call a miracle." (M81)

We no longer need to be satisfied with the "static" that the world offers us. It is time for us to live the life God intended. We were created to be heirs to the kingdom and we need to accept that inheritance. The world and its myriad of problems cannot change the truth of who we are or the love that God has for us. We need to start looking at these problems and look through them with God's Help to see the answer. That is the miracle God wants us to experience.

A Course in Miracles tells us that whatever the distress in our lives or the world, it is a call for help. No matter whether we think the deed was done maliciously, purposefully or accidentally, the answer is always the same. "The only judgment involved is the Holy Spirit's one division into two categories; one of love and the other the call for love." (T294) The Course goes on to say that we are too bound to our perceptions to recognize love or a call for love and therefore we do not really respond to what a person or a situation is really offering us. But we can, with God's Help, allow a miracle to shift our perception to see the gift of every person and situation in which we find ourselves.

When Jeffrey was just learning to speak, he would talk all the time. When we would drive around in the car, he would be busily looking out the windows taking in and commenting on each thing that caught his eye. I would always try to comment on what he said and help him say the words. But one day his words were far better than mine. We drove by the scene of a terrible accident. The car was squashed up like an accordion. Not a word came out of Jeffrey's mouth as he looked, and I wasn't quite sure what to say but the obvious. Before I could say a word, Jeffrey put his arms out towards the car and said, "Hug!" He saw the hurt and his instinct was so right.

"When a brother acts insanely, he is offering you an opportunity to bless him. His need is yours." (T127)

We need to look with the innocence of a child and that is what the Holy Spirit can help us do. The Holy Spirit's vision looks through the form of the problems in our life straight to the truth. He lifts us out of our desire to sit and dwell on what we think was done to us, so that we might be healed. He sees every block to our peace as an extension of love or a call for love, and therefore knows that the only answer is love. The Course reminds us that this way of seeing cannot be hard to do, since it is not we who do it -- that is the Holy Spirit's job. Our job is to want it to be done.

We have that opportunity now. Every time we enter into the holiday season, our thoughts seem to turn to the possibility of peace and love for our lives and the world. It all depends on us. Where will we dwell? Will we remain in the static thoughts of judgment and fear? Or, will we recognize that we deserve more and tune into God's love to lead the way in all our actions?

I am hopeful. I read the newspaper and listen to the news; and when I allow God's love to lead the way, I am grateful that into each situation I encounter, I can offer a blessing. I have another chance to be a miracle worker and bring the awareness of love to my mind by extending that as my gift to the world. As the Course requests, "Let us be glad that we can walk the world, and find so many chances to perceive another situation where God's gift can once again be recognized as ours!" (T668) If we can tune into this truth, this will truly be a holy season.

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An Answer for the World

A few years back, a group of theologians came together in an attempt to go through the Bible and decide by group consensus what were the actual words of Jesus. Entitled The Jesus Seminar, they were to look at the few hundred words attributed to him and determine what did or didn't seem consistent with his message. As you can imagine, when you get a group of people together to decide on anything it can take years. Even though Jesus in the Bible did not say many words, the words that have been attributed to him have varied between the different translations. So these theologians, with their vast ecclesiastic knowledge, voted by the use of different colored beads as to what really sounded like the words and message of the Messiah. In the end there was only one quote that all the theologians totally agreed upon and that was, "Render unto Caesar the things that are Caesar's, and to God the things that are God's." (Mathew 22:21)

As I pondered that line, I realized how consistent that thought was with the core message of A Course in Miracles. In the Bible, Jesus asked us to be in the world not of it. In the Course we read, "the sole responsibility of the miracle worker is to accept the Atonement for himself." (T25) We are not asked to try and change the world but to heal our minds. Render unto the world (to the people of that time, "Caesar" was the symbol for world) what is the world's . . . all the toys and trinkets of the world . . . and render unto God what is His . . . our minds and hearts. The Course is constantly asking us to lift our attention from the effect of the world and look to the cause (our own thinking). Isn't that what the Course is telling us when it says, "What the world is, is but a fact. You cannot choose what this should be. But you can choose how you would see it. Indeed, you must choose this."?(M29)

The ego is alive and well in controversy!

There has been a lot of concern in this country after the re-election of George W. Bush. Sides have seemed polarized either for or against. If you are on the side whose candidate won, you feel vindicated and pleased. If your candidate lost, some have felt deep despair. This dualistic thinking is what keeps the world going. Where would we be without conflict and sides? The answer might be: peace. But, then that is not very satisfying to our ego and probably too simplistic.

The ego looks for controversy. To the ego, we need to divide and separate -- that is how it looks at everything. Yet the Holy Spirit looks at the same things and seeks only to find unity and healing. There is a powerful line in the Course that says, ". . . you believe that without the ego, all would be chaos. Yet I assure you that without the ego, all would be love."(T312) We think we need the ego and its judgments to keep the world going, to clarify things, to get things done. But it's not working. I don't feel my thinking is clearer or more productive when I am judging. As the Course tells us, when we think with the ego, we are really doing nothing. The ego has just made its "nothing stuff" look like something, and we have all fallen for it!

Even the Course has not escaped controversy. But, why should that surprise any of us? The Course itself is part of this illusion, but it is a part that can lead us out of this illusion if we so choose. Our ego can use the Course to divide and separate, or it can be used by the Holy Spirit to lift us out of this world to a place of peace and comfort. I have watched many controversies with the Course come and go over the twenty-eight years that I have been a student of it. Everything from people using the quote "I am not a body. I am free" to mean, "you should have sex with me or you aren't very spiritual"-- to others creating a cult around the Course. But, this again should surprise no one. The Bible or any spiritual thought system can be used by our ego for many hateful and hurtful purposes.

The ego can use the guise of being "a good student" of the Course as a way to promote guilt. I can't tell you how many times I have heard students say, "I try to do the workbook lessons, but I feel so guilty when I can't remember to do it or don't do it for the prescribed time every day." Our ego takes a tool like the Course that was intended to lead us out of guilt and turns it into a way to bury us in more guilt. We need to remember that the ego is "learning" this course right along with us and will use it against us to make us feel unworthy and separated.

It's time for the universal experience

Whether it be controversy concerning the Course's copyright, who has the "correct" interpretation of what the Course is saying, or the seemingly "different" versions of the Course -- what is really going on is the ego's need to maintain its existence by keeping us divided. Nothing is beyond the ego's grip -- not even A Course in Miracles. The Course itself says that in the end we must forget this world, forget this Course and come with wholly open hands unto our God. As we read in the Course, ". . . those who seek controversy will find it. Yet those who seek clarification will find it as well. They must be willing to overlook controversy recognizing that it is a defense against truth in the form of a delaying maneuver. . . A universal theology is impossible, but a universal experience is not only possible but necessary." (M77)

I sometimes think that the so-called religious thinkers of the world, whether they be Christian, Muslim or of A Course in Miracles, need to get their hands a little dirty in the world instead of just writing and talking about it. We need to bring our theology to life.

I have been working with inner-city kids for the last eight years. They don't care that I teach or talk about A Course in Miracles or that I have run a Center based on it for twenty-seven years. They care that I love them; that I am there for them when their families can't be or when the world has regarded them as "not worth the effort." Frankly, I learn and teach more in those encounters with them than all the meditation times I have had. We all need to get out of ourselves more and live these principles if we want to make a quantum leap in our consciousness. Trying to get everyone to think our way or finding the right version of the Course that will unlock the secrets of Jesus is meaningless, but living the message of love, compassion and forgiveness that was the experience of Jesus is not only meaningful but necessary.

Real help

So, how do we do it? I go back to the Biblical quote that I began this article with: "Render unto God what is God's and to the world what is the world's." If we truly live this calling, then we must step back from our judgments of the world and all that is going on in the world. It is time for us to look at the world and stop trying to fix the problems of the world at the level of effect or we will only get more effects.

A friend once told me that she had come home to find her husband in a panic as he tried to clean up an overflowing toilet. When she walked into the river of flowing water, the first thing she did was turn off the toilet tank water. That stopped the problem for a moment so the effect could be cleaned up. Then they could deal with the real problem.

We are drowning in the river of our own making, but trying to clean up the mess while the mess is still swirling in our minds will do no good. We cannot clean up the effect (all our problems) when we are still bombarded by the problems. We need to rise above the battleground, as the Course puts it, and place our attention on the level of the cause (our minds) where correction can be made -- we must render unto God what is His: our minds and hearts.

But then we shout, "I have to do something!" And, my answer is, "Yes, we do -- but not alone." We can do nothing alone, but our ego has convinced us that we can.

Believe me, I am a doer. I, for many years, have believed that I could do it all and simply pulled everyone else along. But now that I have a very active six year-old boy added to the mix, I cannot. I actually never could and now I realize I really don't want to do it all anymore. There is so much more joy in joining with another and there is so much more wisdom. Now imagine joining with the power and wisdom of God when you are faced with the challenges of life -- now we have a winning combination and the power of the universe to help us.

Help that passeth understanding

My mom was (and now I know she still is) such a part of my life. She worked at the Center answering the phones and helping in such wonderful and needed ways. She was my friend and my shopping buddy. When she died, I wondered how that void would be filled; how would I go on? This was one situation that I could not control. I had no choice but to surrender and the moment I did, I was carried by God's love. People and circumstances happened that I could not have orchestrated. I had no choice but to render unto the world what was the world's -- I could not stop my mom's death. But as I did surrender and turned to God, I received a peace and support that truly did passeth all understanding.

As long as we focus on the problems of the world, we will have the problems. As long as we focus on what we have lost, we will feel lost. As long as we focus on pain and suffering, that will be the world that reflects back to us. The moment that we stop playing the world's game and start embracing God's will for us, we will be transformed.

Faith and shoes

It takes faith and faith is a process. Maybe our faith is weak. After all, we don't exercise that muscle very much except when we are in trouble. So as much as we need an exercise routine for our bodies, we need an exercise routine for our faith. When we commit to an exercise routine, we begin to see the change, and the same is true for faith. When we commit to living our lives as if God is our partner, we will begin to experience a transformation.

My son is learning to tie his shoe. We all take that for granted, but in this day and age of Velcro, most kid's shoes don't have shoelaces, so he really has had no need or desire to learn. Now he has a pair of shoes he likes and they have shoelaces, so there is more desire to learn. But I am finding it is not that easy to explain, it is easier to show him. But, even that is sort of challenging. I notice that he gets frustrated when he can't do it and walks away. I try to come up with all sorts of ways to make it fun and interesting -- I even recorded the SpongeBob SquarePant's episode on tying shoes! I know he will get it, but it will be in his own time. And, like all of us, when he finally does learn, it will be so easy and natural that he will wonder why it seemed so hard before.

Faith in God and His power to transform our lives is like tying our shoes. It may seem hard and we may get discouraged and turn away, but we will get it because in truth He is all there is -- He is the Answer. God continues to be there to help us -- making life fun, joyous and exciting, but if we choose to turn away from Him because our faith is weak, that is our choice. It does not lessen Him, but it does cause us to experience the world of pain and suffering we see. When we finally begin to experience the benefits of faith in our lives, we will be more inclined to turn to Him again and again until we realize that God is all there is. It will be as natural as tying our shoes!

In the end . . .

Rendering unto the world what is the world's is not living in denial, being naïve or giving up. It is finally correcting our focus. No politician, religious theologian, Course-based teacher or version of the Course will save you or answer your needs. The only answer to that emptiness and confusion in your life is to remember the presence of God. "I am as God created me." (WB lessons 94,110,162)

So when we are faced with the impossible situations of the world or our lives, let us not dwell in the effect, the problem, the "battleground" of the world. Let us "dust off" the world and render unto God what is God's -- our minds and hearts and let Him lead the way.

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A Course in Miracles for the Purpose Driven Life

A few years ago, Rick Warren, an evangelical pastor at one of the nation's largest mega-churches, wrote a book that has been on the non-fiction best sellers list ever since. His book, The Purpose Driven Life, has been a phenomenal success. I have read his book and, even though it does not necessarily "feed" my soul, I think the book speaks to a deep need and desire in each of us; we all want to know our purpose. We want to know how we fit in -- how we can make a difference. We want to feel our contribution is valuable.

We often call our purpose our profession -- what we do for a living. Our profession can be what we get paid for or what we do without pay, which can be just as important, like being parents.

This last Mother's Day, our son told me how important I was in the card he gave me. It said:

Mom, I can't imagine what life would be like without you. I'd probably be eating candy I got from a stranger, talking with my mouth full and waving around sharp objects while I sit too close to the TV in yesterday's underwear.

Our work is part of our purpose, but it is not all. Things will always change. Our jobs get downsized at work and even at home -- as our children grow up and no longer need us reminding them about yesterday's underwear. And, that makes us feel uncertain and purposeless in this world.

I think the plethora of reality television shows is a symptom of a deeper societal desire. Reality shows propel the everyday Joe and Jane into stardom. And we live vicariously through their experiences. It seems to give our lives purpose as we call in and vote for our favorite American Idol. I used to be so irritated with the overwhelming amount of reality shows, until I realized the deeper purpose of their appeal. These shows speak to our longing to make a difference in the world . . . to be purposeful. But we need a purpose that is eternal. Otherwise, when the reality show is over, we feel empty until the next installment.

That is why it is so important for us to have a spiritual path. A spiritual path gives us purpose and direction that is "in the world but not of it." It has been said that we are mind, body and spirit. As we start our day, we may plan our schedules and set our goals. We make sure our hair is right, our clothes are on and everything is zipped, but we will walk around with little thought of our soul's spiritual yearning. We would never leave the house looking a mess, but we don't think twice about leaving our minds a mess. We think no one will see that, but the world we experience is the direct result of our unmade, purposeless minds.

In the Bible we are told a very important truth: "Seek ye first the kingdom of Heaven and everything else will be given unto you." This thought answers the struggles of the world and sets us in line with our real purpose. When we start inviting God's presence into everything we do, making that our purpose, we will see the world, as we know it, begin to transform.

In the sci-fi movie thriller The Matrix, our world has been taken over by computers and now humanity is at the verge of extinction. Mankind is looking for the "One" who will be their "messiah." Well, the actor Keanu Reeves comes along as Neo (clever how if you move the letters around it spells "one") and he ends up being the "One" they are looking for. But for him to become the "One", HE must realize that he is the "One." In the final scene, when he realizes his true identity and purpose, the Matrix (the thing that holds the computer world of control together) begins to dismantle itself. Neo doesn't have to necessarily destroy it (although we do have the big movie fight scene for the sake of ratings); it falls apart all by itself.

So it is with our experience of this world. A Course in Miracles reminds us over and over again that we are not here to change the world but to change our minds about the purpose of the world. Once we do that, the world, as we know it, will be no more. It will be transformed by the power of God. The Course tells us what the purpose of the world is:

"Forget not that the healing of God's Son is all the world is for. That is the only purpose the Holy Spirit sees in it, and thus the only one it has. Until you see the healing of the Son as all you wish to be accomplished by the world, by time and all appearances, you will not know the Father nor yourself. For you will use the world for what is not its purpose, and will not escape its laws of violence and death. Yet it is given you to be beyond its laws in all respects, in every way and every circumstance, in all temptation to perceive what is not there, and all belief God's Son can suffer pain because he sees himself as he is not." (T512)

I truly believe this is one of the most powerful, straightforward and practical passages in the Course. If we do not use the world for the purpose that the Holy Spirit sees in it, which is to heal ourselves and those we think of or come in contact with, then we will be misusing the world and will suffer under its laws of violence and death. Where are we living right now? Do we see violence and death all around us? Or, have we changed our purpose about the world? We have the ability to escape the world's laws entirely, but we must change our minds about the purpose of the world and how we fit in.

We think we are the ugly duckling when we are actually the beautiful swan. If you remember the children's story, the baby swan is accidentally left with the duck family to be raised. The poor little swan never fits in. His feet look funny and his neck is too long. His life is one of suffering and sadness because he is trying to be what he is not. It is only when he finally sees the other swans that he realizes that he is not a duck after all.

We are trying to be ducks when we are actually swans. We are trying to fit into the world and make it work. But it will never work, since the world was made to exclude God and the awareness of our spiritual purpose.

So you might be wondering, "Does that mean that if I function in this world, i.e., have a job, have a relationship, make money, etc. that I am excluding God?" No, not at all. We must be "in this world but not of it" to truly make a difference. We can do everything in this world, but with a new and revitalized purpose.

It is time for us to live like secret agents. We do everything that everyone else does -- get up every morning, make meals, take care of our kids, go to work, put money away in a savings account, pay our bills, etc., but we do it with a deeper purpose. Knowing that we are nowhere by accident and that our "secret" purpose is to heal the Son of God (which is everyone we come in contact with), gives us great purpose to get out of bed everyday! The world may tell you this is a "mission impossible," but to God it is a very possible mission. Actually it is a "mission inevitable," because it is God's Will that we heal.

A Course in Miracles reminds us of the purpose of our learning:

"The purpose of your learning is to enable you to bring the quiet with you, and to heal distress and turmoil. This is not done by avoiding them and seeking a haven of isolation for yourself.

You will yet learn that peace is part of you, and requires only that you be there to embrace any situation in which you are." (W80)

So we must not deny the world or our place in it, but walk through this world bringing the peace of God into every situation where we find ourselves. How do we do that? By embracing every situation in which we find ourselves, realizing our deeper purpose and remembering that we are not alone.

Therefore, as God's Presence leads the way in our lives, "every relationship becomes a lesson in love." (T312) And, He "sees the world as a teaching device for bringing you home." (T80)

It is time for us to reevaluate the world and the things of the world. In the midst of tragedies, we see opportunities to express God's healing love instead of a reason to sit in feelings of pity and powerlessness. It is time for us to accept our true purpose and ask God what he would have us do for His beloved Child.

The other day, Bob, a member of the Center's study group, was sharing that he had finally asked his adult son to move out. His son had been out for quite a while, but needed a little help during a tough time and Bob offered him a place. After a few months, Bob felt it was time for his son to be on his own again. There were hard feelings. When the son moved out he did some things that were not very kind -- in fact, very nasty. Bob found, that in his son's haste to leave, he left his laundry in the dryer. It was important laundry since it included a lot of his work clothes. Bob's first thought was "payback," so he put the clothes in a trash bag and put them in the trashcan. But that night, he could not sleep. It didn't feel right. The next morning before work, Bob took the trash bag out of the trash and put it on the front porch with a note saying, "You left these in the dryer. I thought you might need them. Love, Dad."

The world would say Bob needed to teach his son a lesson, and quite frankly he did: He taught him a lesson in love. That lesson will transform the world because Bob joined with the Presence of God and sought a deeper purpose.

There is a wonderful poem that has been attributed to Mother Teresa because it was found on the wall of her children's home in Calcutta, India. But, she did not write the poem. Kent Keith wrote it in 1968, but do you think it would have had much influence were it not attributed to Mother Teresa? And, for some reason, Kent Keith didn't seem to mind "anyway." The message is what is important.

Do it Anyway

People are often unreasonable, illogical and self-centered. . .
Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives...
Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies...
Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you...
Be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight...
Build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous...
Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow...
Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough...
Give the world the best that you've got anyway.

You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God...
It was never between you and them anyway.

We are here for a deeper purpose. We need to move past the pettiness of the world and hold on to the truth. We are here to heal the Son of God and we are given a chance every day in every holy encounter to do just that. And, when we do, we will experience a purpose driven life.

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A Focus on Life

"Why did Jesus have to die?" asked my five year-old, looking at me with his big blue eyes. I was shocked! How could such a sophisticated thought be coming out of his mouth? And, how would I answer? I asked him where he came up with the question and he said he read it on the cover of Time Magazine. My pride over the fact that my five-year-old could read the magazine cover was quickly overshadowed by my parental desire to be honest, but not frightening; clear, but not complicated. I asked him if he would like to sit down and talk about it. He looked at me and said, "No, I'd rather watch SpongeBob."

I felt a sigh of relief, but the question lingered in my mind. The world does not really answer this question nor did the Time Magazine article, but in the Course we are given an answer that makes a lot of sense to me. The Course tells us that Jesus' death was only part of the mix. The example of him being betrayed, beaten and killed could not truly affect the Son of God. Jesus tells us that he did not share in the perception of persecution or death. "My one lesson, which I must teach as I learned it, is that no perception that is out of accord with the judgment of the Holy Spirit can be justified. I undertook to show this was true in an extreme case [the crucifixion], merely because it would serve as a good teaching aid to those whose temptation to give in to anger and assault would not be so extreme. I will with God that none of His Sons should suffer." (T94)

He used the most extreme example of death to show us that nothing in this world is more powerful than the love of God. He undid the illusion of the world by showing us that what we call death -- the end of a body -- did not end life. He showed us that the greatest fear of our ego, our finality, is an illusion. Jesus' physical death was not the end of his life. He lived on. That is why Jesus in the Course is asking us to not focus on the crucifixion but to move on to the resurrection.

The journey to the cross should be the last "useless journey." Do not dwell upon it, but dismiss it as accomplished. If you can accept it as your own last useless journey, you are also free to join my resurrection. Until you do so your life is indeed wasted. . . . Do not make the pathetic error of "clinging to the old rugged cross." The only message of the crucifixion is that you can overcome the cross. Until then you are free to crucify yourself as often as you choose. This is not the Gospel I intended to offer you. We have another journey to undertake, and if you will read these lessons carefully they will help prepare you to undertake it. (T52)

As you read the Course, it becomes clear that the "Gospel" Jesus intends for us to accept is our oneness with God; to heal the thought of separation between our Creator and us, which is how the Course defines the atonement. He stresses that the only way for us to heal that thought of separation is by using the relationships that stand before us . . . each person we meet becomes our "holy encounter." The encounters we have with each person, either physically or mentally, become the way we either remember our oneness with God or lose that awareness -- whether we experience crucifixion or resurrection.

When you meet anyone, remember it is a holy encounter. As you see him you will see yourself. As you treat him you will treat yourself. As you think of him you will think of yourself. Never forget this, for in him you will find yourself or lose yourself. (T142)

Last year, Mel Gibson's movie, The Passion of the Christ, stirred up a lot of "passion." From the perspective of the Course, the filmmaker focused and paused his lens on only one aspect of the life of Jesus. And that aspect is not the focus of the Course. Nonetheless, The Passion began a conversation that has put Jesus on the front page of magazines and newspapers and made us all look at what we think is the message of "why did Jesus have to die?"

In Christianity there are at least two schools of thought on this question of the atonement: substitutionary and exemplary. In substitutionary atonement, Jesus is seen as paying the price for our sins. Because Jesus (the innocent lamb of God) suffered and died on the cross, we are given new life. This guilt-inspiring approach has kept Jesus and God distant to many people, and is certainly not the Course's approach.

In exemplary atonement, however, we find a closer fit. Exemplary atonement states that the mission and purpose of Jesus' life was to model for humankind the power of God's love and forgiveness. As one proponent of exemplary atonement said, "it is not Jesus' death that can save us, but his life!"

Why did Jesus have to die? Well, from the Course's perspective, he didn't die. Nothing can end what is eternal, and life is eternal. Can a body be destroyed? Yes, it is not eternal and it is also not you. From the Course's perspective, the purpose of our body is only for communication. As we read in the Course, "As you let the Holy Spirit teach you how to use the body only for purposes of communication, and renounce its use for separation and attack which the ego sees in it, you will learn you have no need of a body at all." (T324) It would appear from the life of Jesus that this is the experience he had. He used his life on this earth to further the message of love and renounce thoughts of separation and attack. He, therefore, finally had no need of a body.

Now, we may be far from having "no need of a body at all," but we can still follow Jesus' example. He used an extreme example of betrayal, abandonment and death to show that there is no justification for attack. He saw "attack" as a call for love and says that "the message of the crucifixion is perfectly clear: Teach only love for that is what you are." (T94)

From what we know of the life of Jesus, that message does seem to be consistent with his life. The question now is: How consistent is that with our lives? It is not easy to "teach only love" in every circumstance, which is why, I guess, Jesus used such an extreme example. It may not be easy, but it is the lesson we must learn and therefore teach.

Let me repeat this quote from the Course:

"My one lesson which I must teach as I learned it, is that no perception that is out of accord with the judgment of the Holy Spirit can be justified. I undertook to show this was true in an extreme case [the crucifixion], merely because it would serve as a good teaching aid to those whose temptation to give into anger and assault would not be so extreme." (T94)

Well, there you have it. He really had one lesson to teach in regard to the crucifixion: nothing that is not in accord with the judgment of the Holy Spirit can be justified.

The Holy Spirit's judgment in every situation is that everyone is either extending love or calling out for love. This is very hard for us to understand because we see bodies, actions and focus on the form of the world and its happenings. That is where the Holy Spirit comes in. If we don't protect our fearful judgments (our need to be right, whether it be righteous or not), the Holy Spirit will step in and reinterpret it. (paraphrase T217) We are not asked to be docile and weak in this world, but rather strong in the power of love guided by the Holy Spirit. After all, have your fears and judgments really made you feel safe?

The Course tells us that teachers of God are needed now more that ever before -- and that God's Voice (which is a synonym for the Holy Spirit) asks of everyone one question only: "Are you ready yet to help Me save the world?" (M82) That does not sound passive to me. It sounds like a call to action -- an action that will finally stop the cycle of fear, guilt, judgment and hopelessness that is the current condition of our living in this world.

It can be done. Jesus did it in a very extreme example to show us that it is possible, even then, to teach only love. We are not alone. We have help during our own "crucifixions." We must stop protecting our judgments, our fears and our rightness and allow the Holy Spirit to reinterpret them. It can be done, but it will take our willingness . . . and it may take some time. But what is wrong with that? That is the purpose of time: to learn to "render the need for time unnecessary." (T246)

I am in my twenty-eighth year of study of the Course and I still have times when I feel crucified. The difference is that it doesn't last as long as it used to, I more quickly ask for Help and with that I see things in a more clear perspective -- and, with a lot more humor.

At our last Holy Encounter Retreat, there was a participant who told me I was "trivial." He said the whole retreat was trivial several times. I didn't feel that way and since I have been called much worse in my lifetime, I just sort of laughed about it. Frankly, I could see he needed a lot of attention and he was really rather frightened. Whenever I saw him or thought about him, I simply sent him a silent blessing and then went on my "trivial" way. He never changed (at least I never saw any difference), but it changed me -- and it seemed to help others. I have received numerous comments from those in attendance who told me that they were very irritated by his constant disruption, and that the way I "dealt" with him helped them to release him and their anger toward him. They were actually able to see him as a child of God in need of love, not judgment. As one person put it, "You were a tremendous role model for seeing past his cries for love and recognizing who he truly is. You helped several of us do the same."

It is the living of the message of Jesus' life that needs to be our focus, not his death. In the Course he is giving us tools to refocus our lens and steer a new course. From the section in the Course entitled The Holy Encounter, from which this publication derived its name, we find a very powerful thought: "Whenever two Sons of God meet, they are given another chance at salvation." (T142) It is not the death of Jesus that gives us salvation; it is allowing the message of his life to reinterpret our relationships with each other into holy relationships. How we see, think or treat each other in every encounter becomes the way we either find or lose our salvation.

I remember reading a story once of a young man who had been raised Christian and had converted to Buddhism. He tried to explain his new faith to his mother, but she would hear nothing of it. She thought he was going to hell. Every time they talked, it became an argument and an attack. He wanted her to respect him and his belief, but she could not. This went on for quite a while until in prayer one day, he found another way. His relationship with his mother began to transform and their time together became a joy instead of a pain. His friends wanted to know the secret. He simply answered, "When we talk about the Buddha, my mother hates it. But when I am the Buddha, my mother loves it."

What painful relationships are robbing you of your salvation? Isn't it time to allow the Holy Spirit to reinterpret them for you so you might experience your resurrection instead of "clinging to the old rugged cross"? Allow this Easter not to be about the death of Jesus, but about his message of love and forgiveness expressed through you to all your relationships. "Salvation is a collaborative venture." (T69) Jesus is simply waiting to help us complete our part.

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Paradise Remembered

"Paka did it, " laughed my son, Jeffrey, when the little magnet fell off the refrigerator. It has become the saying around our house when anything seems to fall by itself, that it is my Dad who is knocking it over to get our attention. As many of your know, my Dad died suddenly last March after a fall that caused a severe brain trauma. This was the first death of a family member that our seven-year-old had experienced. I told Jeffrey that when someone's body dies their spirit lives on in our hearts. So, no one is really ever gone, for they are a part of us --- living in our hearts and minds. Every time we think of them, we feel them with us.

So, what started the legend of Paka knocking things over? Well, a few weeks after my Dad's passing I framed and hung a large painting of my dad up on our wall. It was done in the 50's by an artist friend of his and is a great caricature painting that really captures my Dad. It is so large that the only place to put it is on a wall that shares space with a rattan room divider -- half of the painting was covered. One day I heard a large crash downstairs. I thought Jeffrey had knocked something over, but he was upstairs too. We both walked cautiously down stairs and found the rattan room divider had fallen over to uncover the complete painting of Paka. I laughed and said, "I guess Paka didn't like that divider in front of his face, so he knocked it over." Jeffrey thought that was so funny that since that day we say anything that falls is Paka's way of getting our attention to remind us that he is always around.

When it comes to these types of matters, my son's faith in me is so strong. If I tell him that life is eternal or that our essence is love, he believes me. He is always quick to remind me that Paka is near -- that Paka and Grandma Tona Angel (the name for my mom who died in 1997 before Jeffrey was born) live in his heart and are always watching out over him. His faith bolsters mine when I start to feel so oppressed by the "reality" of the world.

So many people I know have recently experienced the death of a loved one. Each one causes me to remember again how miraculous and beautiful my Dad's death was. His death brought me to a level of experience about the eternal nature of life that has no counterpart in this world. Nevertheless, that does not stop me from feeling disconnected at times from them and my eternal connection. I fall into the trap of feeling we are separated because I can't see their bodies. The other day I was feeling that sadness, and Jeffrey knew why I was sad. He took the pad of paper that was in front of me and drew two smiley faces. One he labeled "Your Dad" and the other "Your Mom." He then wrote the words coming from both their mouths, "Hi Beverly!"

That piece of paper hangs by my desk as a reminder of eternal life -- a connection beyond the form. I am not looking for a ghostly visit or a message from beyond; the message of eternal life is found when we reach out to each other in love. As we come upon the Easter season once again, the message that rings true for me is not that of Jesus' death, but of his life filled with expressions of love. And I felt God's love and my parents' love, when my child reached out to me in help and joining.

There is such a tendency to be bound to the forms of this world in a very literal way. We try to find meaning and understanding for our lives in the things that happen. And yet, the Course tells us that we will never find true meaning in the things of this world, for this world was not made for clarity but rather confusion. Does that mean that we deny the world or the things in it? Of course not -- but we don't cherish them either. We use them as steppingstones to the awareness of peace, love and our eternal unity.

The job of the Holy Spirit, according to the Course, is to mediate between the seeming duality we see (i.e., love and fear, ego and spirit) and side in favor of the truth. "The Holy Spirit is in the part of the mind that lies between the ego and the spirit, mediating between them always in favor of the spirit." (T132) The Holy Spirit sees everything we see and gently guides us to see that experience not in a literal context but in a universal context -- one that emphasizes an eternal message.

When I think of the stories of the life of Jesus, I don't think of them so much as literal but metaphorical. Did Jesus raise Lazarus from the dead as the Bible reports? Or, did he raise the dead thoughts (our thoughts of fear, judgment and anger) of the people? Did he feed the masses with a few loaves and fish? Or were the people hungry for a message of truth that truly filled them so their aimless searching was fed. Did Jesus die on a cross to have his body rise up three days later? Or did he show us that the body is not our reality and that his universal message of love and forgiveness would rise up past the limits of this world?

A Course in Miracles says,

"A slain Christ has no meaning. But a risen Christ becomes the symbol of the Son of God's forgiveness on himself; the sign he looks upon himself as healed and whole." (T425)

My son's note helped me to rise up and remember my eternal connection. When something falls in our house, I am reminded that love never ends. Every experience becomes a window that shines in the miraculous light of God's love to transform our lives or not. We can turn away and wander into valleys of darkness and suffering, but we can't stop God's Will for us: our peace and healing.

The Course so beautifully tells us in the following passage that the Easter week is not a static, historic event but the story of our emerging life's journey and the salvation that is promised us. . .

"A week is short, and yet this holy week is the symbol of the whole journey the Son of God has undertaken. He started with the sign of victory, the promise of the resurrection, already given him. Let him not wander into the temptation of crucifixion and delay him there. Help him to go in peace beyond it, with the light of this own innocence lighting his way to his redemption and release. Hold him not back with thorns and nails when his redemption is so near. But let the whiteness of your shining gift of lilies speed him on his way to resurrection.

"Easter is not the celebration of the cost of sin, but of its end." (T425)

We hold in our hands the opportunity to heal the Son of God. As we reach out to each other in love and kindness, we become God's hands and heart on earth. Our own forgiving thoughts and simple acts of kindness take the "thorns and nails" out of the collective brow and hands of humanity. We thereby see no difference between our journey and another's -- and know that their healing is ours as well. For it is together, past all the seeming differences of the world, that we enter into Paradise and know the peace of God.

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An Interruption

Death is never convenient. You can't schedule it in on a calendar so you can prepare everyone and everything for it. It happens in many cases when you least expect it, and even if you are expecting it, it is still a shock. Death interrupts our busy lives. But it is in the interruptions of life that we find God.

My dad, Clarence Howard Hutchinson, interrupted my life on March 17, 2005, to show me the power of God's love and His infinite care. My dad was 83, but he was a vital and active 83-year old. He was still doing what he loved: working and traveling with my brother. The morning of his accident, he was in Sacramento, California (about 400 miles from me), and had just finished breakfast with my brother and a friend. As my brother paid the bill, Clarence left the restaurant and climbed up the three concrete steps that lead to the motel where he was staying. When he got to the top of the unleveled steps, he lost his balance and fell backwards -- he must have attempted to catch his balance because everything he had in his hands went flying. His head hit the bottom of the last step and he suffered a serious brain trauma.

My dad was in the trauma care unit for a week and his family was by his side -- praying with him, singing to him and loving him. He never regained consciousness during that time, but we did for a while have some hand squeezes and closed-eyed blinks to direct questions, so I knew my dad's wishes.

All during the week that my dad was in trauma care a bluebird would come to visit, tap on the window, and then fly away. He loved the thought of the bluebird of happiness -- so it seemed appropriate.

When my dad finally made his passing, it was a gentle release. Physically, he looked radiant. His skin was free of wrinkles; the nurses thought he looked better than someone with Botox! His hands were supple -- he looked glorious.

At the moment when my dad took his last peaceful, gentle breath, he opened his eyes (the first time he had done so since the accident). With beautiful blue eyes, he looked straight ahead as if to say, "I am in this world but not of it. I am with Christ." He then gently closed his eyes again. The thing is, his eyes were brown, not blue. And a few moments later, that bluebird was back tapping at the window and then flew off. We never saw it again.

After I shared this story in our study group meeting at the Center, a listener e-mailed me to tell me that, according to Native American belief, a bluebird is a totem or power animal that symbolizes a passage of time and movement into another level of being. And, that is definitely what I felt.

My dad's death was beautiful, gentle and glorious. He was now free to fly, unencumbered by the world. Through his death, he reaffirmed and recommitted my faith in such a way that I have no doubt that life is eternal. And I think he is offering that to all of us right now to sort of give us a "faith lift!"

I want to share with you what A Course in Miracles says about death in its supplemental pamphlet, The Song of Prayer:

"This is what death should be; a quiet choice, made joyfully and with a sense of peace, because the body has been kindly used to help the Son of God along the way he goes to God. We thank the body, then, for all the service it has given us. But we are thankful, too, the need is done to walk the world of limits, and to reach the Christ in hidden form and clearly seen at most in lovely flashes. Now we can behold Him without blinders, in the light that we have earned to look upon again.

"We call it death, but it is liberty. It does not come in forms that seem to be thrust down in pain upon unwilling flesh, but as a gentle welcome to release. If there has been true healing, this can be the form in which death comes when it is time to rest a while from labor gladly done and gladly ended. Now we go in peace to freer air and gentler climate, where it is not hard to see the gifts we gave were saved for us. For Christ is clearer now; His vision more sustained in us; His Voice, the Word of God, more certainly our own."

My dad had true healing, for his transition was a gentle release. His labor is done and now he goes on to freer air and gentler climate, where he knows that all the gifts of love and support that he gave were saved for him...and he is experiencing that now.

My dad and mom were both vital to the beginning of Miracle Distribution Center. If it had not been for my dad's seeking and searching for a spirituality that would truly "feed" him, I don't know if my brother and I would be the people we are today. When I was five or six, I remember my dad's decision not to go to church anymore. He had been raised Methodist and my mother, Lutheran, but he could not take the "hell-fire and damnation" of the traditional church. He knew there was something more. It took my dad about six years to find Unity with its metaphysical approach to the Bible. Then he felt like he found a home. With Unity as a base, there was fertile ground in all of us to accept A Course in Miracles when it came into our awareness in 1977.

As a family, we all became students of the Course. When I look back now, I see what an amazing thing that was, but at the time it just seemed natural and normal. My parents loved the Course and offered their physical, financial and emotional support to the beginning of the Center. Anyone who has benefited from the work of the Center has been touched by the love and commitment of my parents.

If you remember the classic movie It's a Wonderful Life with Jimmy Stewart, you might recall that the angel that helps Stewart realize he had a wonderful life was named Clarence. In life, through the work of the Center, my dad helped many to realize their "wonderful life." And, now through his death, he is doing the same.

As I mentioned previously, I shared about my dad's death at our meetings at the Center. After listening to the CD of the experience, a long-time friend shared a miracle with me. Her mother died about eight years ago and she had always had such guilt over the fact that she was not with her mother at her passing and that her mother had suffered so much pain. After she listened to the recording of my experience with my dad, she had a dream of her mother. In the dream, her mother was beautiful (make-up and hair perfect) and radiant. She told her mom how beautiful she was, as if that was such a surprise since her mom had been in such pain at the end of her life. Her mom gently chuckled off the comment with a wave of the hand as if to say there is no pain, there is no guilt. That was just an illusion -- the beauty and the radiance is all that is real. She told me this vision of her mother, that has brought her so much peace and comfort, was directly related to the sharing of the experience of my dad's death. I am so honored to be a part of her healing and I know that my dad is, too.

There is no greater gift than to touch another's life in a healing and helpful way. Truly, that is what it means to succeed. Emerson said it best when he wrote:

To laugh often and much;
To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children;
To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends;
To appreciate beauty;
To find the best in others;
To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition;
To know even one life has breathed easier because you lived.
This is to have succeeded.

My dad's life was a success, not because he did great things in the world, but because he did as Mother Teresa said, "Small things with great love." Through my dad's life and now through his death, he has taught and continues to teach so much. So, thank you, Daddy, I appreciate the interruption and the lesson of your life!

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Above the Battleground

As we were planning this year's international conference on A Course in Miracles, the section from the Course entitled "Above the Battleground" (T461/496) popped into my mind. I did not pick this title for the conference because I wanted us to talk about battles or war; I picked it because I wanted us to talk about and experience peace.

If you have ever read this section, you quickly realize that the battleground is the everyday experiences of our lives in which we see ourselves as separate and at odds with each other. Every day we arm ourselves for war, so to speak, with our defenses, grievances, and judgments. We do not see ourselves as one with our brother or one with our Father. That sort of perception is seen as naive or perhaps hoped for in some future experience when we have all "evolved." We don't see that we have made a choice for "murder" instead of "miracles." We have murdered the awareness of the Son of God (who we truly are) and settled for the pain and suffering of the world instead of the healing miracle God is holding out to us.

The Course tells that we don't even know we have done all this. We are not even aware of what we have "sacrificed" for this world of pain. All we know is the pain and suffering -- it has become a habit, the "norm," that we expect. And, from the perspective of the battleground of the world, it is what we deserve.

So how do we "win" this "war?" Well, not by fighting or attacking, but by transcending. We are to allow ourselves to be lifted up above the battleground, to a higher place where we can look from a new perspective at the situation we are experiencing. As the Course tells us:

"Here in the midst of it [the struggle and battles of life], it does seem real. Here you have chosen to be part of it. Here murder is your choice. Yet from above, the choice is miracles instead of murder. And the perspective coming from this choice shows you the battle is not real, and easily escaped." (T462/497)

In The Holy Encounter and at the Center's study group meetings, I have been asking you to send me your favorite quote from the Course and perhaps share the reason it is your favorite. I recently received a favorite quote and explanation of how it has affected her life from Sudie Shipman in Ft. Lauderdale, Florida. I feel her story highlights the point above. She wrote:

"I had lunch with The Holy Encounter today and decided to write and let you know my favorite quote from the Course. How could I possibly have just one? But, here goes. ‘Sickness is a defense against the Truth.' (Workbook Lesson 136)

"It took me a long time to really come to terms with that lesson. Every time I was feeling sick, I would pick up the Course and read that passage. One day when my ego was not getting in the way and I had stepped out of my fear, Holy Spirit really had me understand that sickness is a choice I make. The lesson says that we choose sickness and then forget that we do, but on this particular day I could actually see, like a stack of dominos falling backward, what past decision had brought me to this point of suffering. In that instant (yes, a Holy one) I was able to ‘choose peace instead of this.'

"My illness didn't go away, but the suffering that usually comes with it did. To this day I still get sick and yet I'm sick in a whole new way. I don't dread it and I'm not frightened by it, I merely recognize that I am defending against God. That somewhere in my past few hours, days or weeks I made a choice to listen to fear instead of love, and then I make a conscious decision to choose love again. The illness may disappear, or not, but my suffering does. My attitude becomes one of acceptance and I am at peace with the illness, not fighting it or figuring out what I've done wrong to get myself in this situation (I recognize analyzing is a function of the ego and stop). I let go and let God and once again I am at rest in His arms."

Sudie allowed herself to be lifted above the battleground and let the Holy Spirit start the healing process. She did not have to struggle to figure out what she had "done" -- that was not the issue. She just wanted to experience healing -- healing of the mind -- so she joined her will with the Holy Spirit, accepted her responsibility for her choice for pain and not peace, and chose again. The result was a miracle (a holy instant) that healed her mind.

We are asked to accept responsibility for our choices, not guilt for our choices. Accepting responsibility allows the Holy Spirit to lift us above the battleground. Feeling guilty for the situations or experiences we find ourselves in "murders" the awareness of peace in our lives. We have chosen attack. Attack of ourselves, our brothers and God. We are separate and our guilt reinforces that choice.

Accepting a miracle instead of the murderous thoughts, allowing the Holy Spirit to lift us above the battleground, lets us experience right now a world of peace that is God's will for us. It does not mean that anything in the "form" of the world changes, but the way we experience that "form" has been transformed. We have no idea from our limited perspective how to make that transformation, but then that is not our concern. Our focus is on rising above the cloud of confusion that the world so often shows us so that we might experience the world of clarity that God has promised us.

It reminds me of how worked up my little boy gets when he is overtired. Nothing satisfies him, not even his favorite toys or activities. He becomes so confused that he "attacks" everything. He doesn't want to go to sleep and yet he does. It is how I get when I am caught in the confusion of the world -- when I am trying to figure everything out, whether it be my personal experiences or my global perceptions. Attack fills my mind; I judge myself and I judge the people and world I see. In that moment, I need to stop. I need to rest from my perception. I need to be lifted above the battleground of my mind to a place of peace and understanding.

Having this awareness is the start. Knowing that there is another choice we can make is very important. But, also recognizing when we are falling into the confusion is important. As the Course reminds us:

"When the temptation to attack rises to make your mind darkened and murderous, remember you can see the battle from above. Even in forms you do not recognize, the signs you know. There is a stab of pain, a twinge of guilt, and above all, a loss of peace. This you know well. When they occur leave not your place on high, but quickly choose a miracle instead of murder. And God Himself and all the lights of Heaven will gently lean to you, and hold you up. For you have chosen to remain where He would have you, and no illusion can attack the peace of God together with His Son." (T462/497)

"A stab of pain, a twinge of guilt, and above all, a loss of peace," all of these, the Course is telling us, are warning signs that we are being tempted to leave the world of peace that God is holding out to us in favor of the painful, suffering world of the ego. Let us not "leave our place on high, but quickly choose a miracle instead of murder." And we are told that this choice will be supported by God Himself. Is there a better support or help?

So, that is what I want us to talk about and experience at our conference in June. I want us to commit and live together our choice to rise above the battleground, to become aware of the temptation to assault love and the truth by cherishing attack, and to support each other as we make together the choice for miracles. I hope you will join us, but if you cannot do so in person, remember, healing is just a thought away.

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Misinformation: Opportunities for Healing

"The trouble with the world is not that people know too little, but that they know so many things that ain't so." Mark Twain

When I first read this quote by Mark Twain, I was struck by how true it was. With the number of talk shows and news programs on television and radio (not to mention the bevy of inaccurate information that floats all over the Internet) it is no longer surprising how much information is out there that just "ain't so." Whether it be the president's sexual misconduct or JFK Jr's tragic plane crash, there's a lot of inaccurate information out there being touted as truth. An interesting example was reported recently in Time magazine. It had to do with the last movie by directing legend, Stanley Kubrick. Starring Tom Cruise and wife Nicole Kidman, the long awaited movie Eyes Wide Shut had caused a lot of speculation and interest because of its content and how closely guarded it was from the media. But our ever- pervasive curiosity was not to be restricted. If the media could not get the inside scoop they would make up the "scoop." Time reported a list of rumors and truths about the movie and, of course, the rumors that had been reported as truths out weighed the actual truths.

This really should not surprise any of us; we have seen it done time and time again. We all have a deep desire to know. The problem is that in our desire to know we have filled in the blank spaces with our own assumptions, and now our assumptions have become fact with the actual truth in a far second place. The world we have built is one based on a lie: the thought that we could be separate from our Creator, God, and thereby separate from each other. And even though this may be a lie, we have built a good case for it in the world of separation. We prove separation with differences we see in our bodies, our ideologies, our feelings of right and wrong, justice and injustice and the list goes on. So even though this world is built on a faulty premise the justifications we see all around us seem to make sense and justify the lie. Now the lie has become our truth and even if we wanted to change, it seems almost impossible to stop the insanity and make that change.

"The separation is merely a faulty formulation of reality, with no effect at all." (T241/258)

The Holy Spirit knows that we have accepted a faulty formulation of reality and His purpose is to help us gently undo the mistake. He will not attack the mistake, for that would give the mistake reality; rather, He merely shows us another way so that we might make a better choice instead.

"Now you are being shown you can escape. All that is needed is you look upon the problem as it is, and not the way that you have set it up. How could there be another way to solve a problem that is very simple, but has been obscured by heavy clouds of complication, which were made to keep the problem unresolved? Without the clouds the problem will emerge in all its primitive simplicity. The choice will not be difficult, because the problem is absurd when clearly seen." (T540/581-2)

The Problem

"If you could recognize that your only problem is separation, no matter what form it takes, you could accept the answer because you would see its relevance. Perceiving the underlying constancy in all the problems that seem to confront you, you would understand that you have the means to solve them all. And you would use the means, because you recognize the problem." (WB139/141)

The Course tells us over and over again that there is only one problem: the thought of separation. And that if we could identify this one problem in the myriad of problems in our lives, the problem could be solved. The only reason that we don't seem to see this constancy is because we have devised such elaborate issues to deal with that to simply say that the problem is our thought of separation between us and God seems naive. And yet, that is exactly our ego's plan. It wants us to believe in the complexity of the world, our lives and our problems so we would never believe that a simple mind change (which, as we all know, isn't necessarily a simple job) could make any difference at all. So the ego sends us on a wild goose chase looking for our answers in the world: a better, more exciting job, a more caring relationship, anything new and intoxicating, more money, food, alcohol, sex, drugs. But at our journey's end we are left wanting more and feeling alone. And our ego tells us, "What did you expect? God doesn't care about you (or that He is not there, has little time for you, or has abandoned you because of this or that). You're alone and you only have the little happiness that I will give you mixed with a lot of pain and suffering that you know you deserve." This message -- or a message similar to this -- plays in our minds and throughout our experiences in this world unless we stop all the misinformation and start relearning the truth.

The Answer Part 1: Who we really are.

First off we must remember who created us. We are not self-created, but created by a Creator who has endowed us with everything: an abundant and loving spirit, a strength of holiness and eternal life. Our Creator, God (or whatever name you give it) loves and cares for us more than we can imagine. Now I suppose we will need to at least have faith in these basic premises, but once we are willing to allow these basic premises into our minds and hearts (whether or not fully believed), miracles begin to happen. The miracles or shifts in our awareness (from fear and loneliness to love and joining) are natural if we get our rightness, fears or stubbornness out of the way. No matter how justified we may feel in our opinions or views about a person or situation, we must be willing to stop and question whether they allow us to be as we were created and to be loving and caring to ourselves or another. Our goal is not to find more support for our opinions, but rather to heal. And we cannot heal when we are so locked into what we think is right or even the ways we should heal. We heal when we allow the Answer that God has given us, the Holy Spirit, to remind us who we are.

One of the activities at the Center is our weekly study group on the Course. We record this group meeting and send tapes to listeners around the world. At every meeting we share "miracle" experiences -- everyday experiences wherein we choose to: "Behold the Son of God and look upon his purity and be still." (T247/265) The following miracle sharing came from one of our tape listeners, Tina Ramsden in New York. She wrote:

"First I wish to thank all of you for offering a tape listener program - it helps me stay motivated in keeping with the Course. I wanted to share a miracle (shift in perception). I was grocery shopping and went to check out, the cashier was young and delinquent looking. I also judged him as rude and indifferent with several earrings throughout his ear. Lucky for me I caught myself directing my self-righteous attitude at this young man and realized what I was doing: Making him bad and me good. I looked at him after I acknowledged my judgment and in my mind said, "You are a child of God." I kept repeating it to myself. Well, the whole dynamic changed, we joked around a little and both ended up smiling. The shift was a whole new perspective. It was a humbling experience to see how wrong I was. I realized that what I originally saw in this young man was not really there. I understand that I could and we all could have days filled with peace by simply remembering each encounter is with a holy child of God.

Thank you again for being a wonderful reminder to me that there is another way to be in this world and also for reminding me of my true function, to bless and acknowledge the truth in each person I meet. Life is so much better when I can remember to do this. Thanks for being a light in a dark world."

Tina's story helps us to see the simple truth that can be experienced when we silence the ego's misinformation and concentrate on who we really are. We are angels with amnesia and we simply need to re-remember who we are -- and the Holy Spirit is there to help us do just that -- that's His job.

The Answer Part 2: We need each other, because we are each other.

"Your brother is the mirror in which you see the image of yourself as long as perception lasts. And perception will last until the Sonship knows itself as whole." (T118/127)

If we believe what the Course is telling us, that separation is the basic problem from which all our pain and unhappiness stems, then it would make sense that the way to correct the problem would be to join. That may be easy to say, but not so easy to do. This again is where the Course lends us a helping hand. It tells us that we merely need to look at the problems we have made (in all their complexity and justification for separation) and recognize that healing the thought of separation is the answer. That's it. We are not asked to do the healing or tell God how the healing should be done. We are just asked to identify it. We are asked not to do what lies beyond our abilities -- healing is the Holy Spirit's job, not ours. And when we try to do what only He can do, He merely waits for us to change our minds.

A few years back Rev. Robert Schuller on his television program, The Hour of Power told about a time when he and his wife were in Hawaii on vacation and they had stopped at a market for some groceries. His wife went inside while he stayed in the car enjoying the breeze with the windows rolled down. Wanting to enjoy the breeze even more so he opened his car door and accidentally bumped the car next to him. The man in the car (even though no damage was done to his car) leaned out of his window and yelled his disgust in some pretty rough language. Tempted to respond in anger, something reminded him of what he always says to his television audience of over 20 million: "God loves you and so do I." Well, he said that he didn't feel like saying that, but he was willing to say to himself, "God loves you and I'm trying."

We must be willing to "try." We must be willing to remember that no matter what another says to us, does to us or tempts us to do, they are God's holy child -- not necessarily in deed and action, but in truth. And the more we hate them or hold them in the prison of our anger, we stay there with them affirming ourselves as unworthy of love or help. We break free of our prisons of isolation as we are willing to let the Holy Spirit help us to see the perceptions of separation we hold against our brothers and allow Him to release us from them.

The Answer Part 3: "The ark of peace is entered two by two." (T404/433)

I have heard some people say that relationships are so painful that it is just best not to have them, and that truly spiritual people don't need relationships. Well, that is just foolish and more a form of denial than help. We cannot hide from relationships; they are all around us. Our relationships are the closest thing in this world to the awareness of God's love and healing.

I was so moved to read the story of William Wilson (known now in AA circles as Bill W.), founder of Alcoholics Anonymous and the 12-step program. Growing up in an alcoholic family, Wilson became a soldier and then a businessman and drank both to alleviate his depressions and to celebrate his successes on Wall Street. He married in 1918 and by all appearances he and his wife looked like a prosperous, promising young couple. By 1933 they were living on charity in his wife's parents' home in Brooklyn, New York. Wilson had become a drunk who disdained religion and panhandled for cash. Finally he was inspired by a friend who had stopped drinking to attend some meetings of the Oxford Group, which was an evangelical society founded in Britain. He also underwent a hospital procedure which was state-of-the-art in alcoholic treatment at the time called "purge and puke." While incarcerated for the fourth time at Town's Hospital in Manhattan, he attended group meetings and read Carl Jung's writings and William James' The Varieties of Religious Experience. It was during that stay in 1934 that Wilson had a "spiritual awakening, " a flash of white light, a liberating awareness of God, that would not only transform his life, but the lives of millions around the world.

A few months later, still sober, Wilson went on a business trip to Akron, Ohio. There, one night after a deal had fallen through, he was tempted to drink. Drawn to the sound of the hotel bar where he was staying, he suddenly became convinced that by helping another alcoholic, he could save himself. Through a series of desperate telephone calls, he found Dr. Robert Smith. Smith was a skeptical drunk whose family persuaded him into talking with Wilson for at least 15 minutes. Their talk went on for hours. A month later Dr. Bob (as he is now known in AA circles) took his last drink, and that date June 10, 1935, is the official birth date of Alcoholics Anonymous. AA is based on the idea that only an alcoholic can help another alcoholic. As Bill W. wrote, "Because of our kinship of suffering, our channels of contact have always been charged with the language of the heart."

I was touched by those words by Bill W: If we are in this world, we all have a "kinship of suffering." Our suffering, pain or problems may look different than another person's, but beneath the ego disguise is the same problem that we all suffer from -- the thought that we are alone, apart from each other, separated from God. But we are not alone and apart and we need each other to remember that and to heal "with the language of the heart". The profound impact of AA on lives is a living testimony to this truth. Aldous Huxley called Bill W. "the greatest social architect of our century."

The awareness and work of Bill W. does give us a scaffolding to work from -- we need each other. Those that walk this earth in pain (and that is all of us) can and must help each other. We can become beacons of light to each other, helping each other to see that our acts of kindness to another helps us and the world. We journey together in this life and the road we take is so much more blessed if we remember we are together and not alone -- one with each other and God.

In closing let me share with you a beautiful passage found in the Course's Workbook for Students in lesson 315 that I feel also gives us a scaffolding to work from:

"Each day a thousand treasures come to me with every passing moment. I am blessed with gifts throughout the day, in value far beyond all things of which I can conceive. A brother smiles upon another, and my heart is gladdened. Someone speaks a word of gratitude or mercy, and my mind receives this gift and takes it as its own. And everyone who finds the way to God becomes my savior, pointing out the way to me, and giving me his certainty that what he learned is surely mine as well."

Let us not allow the misinformation of the world to cause us to turn away from God or each other. A faulty premise, a lie, is nothing to build a life on. Let us look clearly at the ego's lie of separation and not be distracted by its artificial web of complexities. And together let us allow the Holy Spirit to do His job by showing us the opportunities and way to join with our brothers. We are, together, our way out of pain -- let's not miss another opportunity for healing.

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What You Truly Deserve

The late comedian Jack Benny was once honored with a distinguished humanitarian award. Upon receiving the award he said, "I don't really deserve this award, but then I have arthritis, and I don't deserve that either. Thank you very much."

Even though Benny was being funny, there was a vein of truth in what he said. When tough things happen in our lives, most of us don't feel we deserve it. Just as when good things happen in our lives, most of us don't feel we deserve it. It is not a question of whether we "deserve" the things that we experience in life; but rather, "How will we handle them, now?"

A Course in Miracles' counsel would be: don't handle them alone. This entire classroom of life is teaching us our purpose and our function. In the Course we read that the proper function of the mind is to be in service to the Holy Spirit. (T11) And this makes perfect sense from the Course's perspective. Since the Course reminds us that our function in this world is forgiveness, it would only be logical that we would need to allow the Holy Spirit to direct our minds and thereby our actions. After all, when was the last time extending or accepting forgiveness was an easy thing for you? We all have areas of our lives in which we have no trouble extending forgiveness: "Please forgive me for stepping on your toe," or "I'm sorry for this or that small infraction or that little error in thinking," etc. But we also have areas in which we feel justified in our feelings of anger, injustice or attack: biggies like war, murder, robbery or even personal slights, disrespect and plain rude behavior. It becomes clear that we can't handle this process alone. We need help.

Many of us have read workbook lesson 193 from A Course in Miracles, "All things are lessons God would have me learn." This lesson is not saying that God is putting lessons in our way. What it is indicating is that every experience in life is an opportunity or "lesson" to remember the presence of God. Every event is a stepping stone to the awareness of God and His peace for us. All things, therefore, are an opportunity to allow forgiveness to lead the way (meaning: allowing our minds to be dedicated to the Holy Spirit). All experiences are an opportunity to remember the unity we share with another.

Perhaps there is a situation in your life right now where you can't see forgiveness to be the practical answer. And yet the Course is telling us it is the only answer that will finally transform our lives and end the cycle of pain we (and the world) seem to find ourselves in. As we read in lesson 193:

"Each lesson has a central thought, the same in all of them. The form alone is changed, with different circumstances and events; with different characters and different themes, apparent but not real. They are the same in fundamental content. It is this:

Forgive, and you will see this differently.

Certain it is that all distress does not appear to be but unforgiveness. Yet that is the content underneath the form. It is this sameness which makes learning sure, because the lesson is so simple that it cannot be rejected in the end."

It is not up to us to figure out how forgiveness could work in this or that situation. We are asked to trust God's Voice that assures us that forgiveness is the answer and allow Him to show us the way. Forgiving does not mean that the situation will magically change, but the way we view the situation will be transformed. A willingness to forgive opens our hearts and minds and allows us to see as God would have us see a situation or person -- with love and compassion. "Forgiveness is the only thing that stands for truth in the illusions of the world." (W249)

The following article was sent to me by a reader of The Holy Encounter who lives in Cortland, New York. A story ran in a newspaper in New York about a woman who had struck and killed a little boy with her car. There had been a lot of negative press and letters about this woman and the incident, so much so that the mother of the child who was killed finally sent the following letter to the Editor of the newspaper.

To the Editor:
I am very distressed by the letters I have read and heard aired by the news media concerning the death of my son, Russell. I am afraid that many people are using this tragedy as license to express their lower instincts.
My small son is dead. There is no waking moment that I am not acutely aware of this. The only relief I feel in my grief is in finding some kind of positive action to occupy my days. There is little I can do now for Russell except in spiritual ways, but this letter is written to ask everyone who is aware of this tragedy to help me safeguard the memory of my little boy.
Please try not to be judgmental concerning the person whose car struck my son. Being compassionate and non-judgmental toward her does not mean condoning her action; it is simply accepting her humanity with an awareness of our own weaknesses.
Please expend your energy and release your feeling of helplessness in the face of this irreversible tragedy by doing something positive. Please hug your children more or stop smoking, give your beer money this month to UNICEF, or rake an elderly neighbor's leaves. Just do something in a spirit of love for little Russell's memory instead of letting his death be the cause of vindictiveness. If you need inspiration to help you change your attitudes, look to Christ's teachings or the Baha'i writings.
My little boy was so full of light and love. Help me to spread the joy of his life to light up the world a little bit. Let me know what you are doing. Seriously, it will give me strength to go on.

We can forgive, because we do not do it alone. The strength of God awaits our little willingness to let Him help us. Let us together forgive by allowing the Holy Spirit to enter any confusion or unpeaceful issue, and begin the process of seeing the world differently. Let the miraculous transformation of the mother in the above story, the example of the life of Jesus and the many seemingly small awarenesses (miracles) I know you have had, be the igniting spark to let forgiveness find a home in your heart.

Whether or not we feel we "deserve" the things that happen to us in this world, we all are entitled to the peace of God. Forgiveness is the means by which we escape the pain, suffering and random happiness of the world and find the eternal peace and consistent happiness God has promised us. Is there really any anger or seeming "rightness" worth the peace of God?

Let us affirm: "I will forgive and see this differently." When anger begins to find a home in your heart, say: "I will forgive and see this differently." When feelings of injustice cause you to question the value of God's children, say: "I will forgive and see this differently." When you begin to value the projection of attack over the extension of mercy, say: "I will forgive and see this differently." The words are not magical, but what they do is allow you to stop the frenzy of your mind for just a moment; cause you to question the value of maintaining anger and separation; and allow the presence of God to return to your awareness to help you even when you may see no hope.

The goal is not to change the world and the circumstances we find ourselves in, it is about being willing to change our minds and allow God to show us a peace that passeth all understanding. And that is what you truly deserve!

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A Holy Instant on the Playground

"That's not fair. You said you'd share!" shouted Jeffrey in a sad voice. He had been playing with one of his best friends, but as five year olds will be, she did not want to share. The swing set only had one black seat and three blue seats, so naturally everyone wanted the one that was different. Jeffrey started on the black one, then they both got off to play somewhere else and when they started to swing again his friend Laura was on the black one. That was okay, though, because they were sharing. But then the deed occurred. When it was time for Laura to share, she didn't want to. Jeffrey walked away sad and then Laura shouted to him that he could swing on the black one. He happily ran back, but then she changed her mind -- she still did not want to share. And so started the episode.

Laura's mother and I watched. I was quietly waiting to see what mom would do. She yelled to Laura, "YOU SHOULD SHARE!" Laura looked at her and in a defiant voice said, "NO!" To which the mom said to me, chuckling, "Oh, she's just like her dad."

I watched two sad little children: One who felt like he had "lost" and one who had "won," but who had "lost" her playmate. They were both alone. Laura on her prize swing with her head hanging down and Jeffrey, head hung down, walking over to the Jungle Gym.

My first inclination as a mother was to defend my son, but I paused. And that pause was enough to restore my sanity. I asked for help within. I knew I needed help before I could be of help. I needed a holy instant on the playground.

A Course in Miracles tells us that the holy instant is any instant and every instant but we will only recognize it as we are willing to gladly give over every plan for finding "magnitude in littleness" and accept God's plan instead. We think we know what will make us happy -- and we usually think that "winning" or triumphing is the way. Laura wanted to win over Jeffrey and my first impulse was to make sure my son "won" by my defense of him. But, just as I saw she was not happy even though she had "won," I realized that if I tried to do the same thing in just a different form, I would fail as well. "Help me Father to accept the holy instant that is before me so that I may follow Your Will for me and share that with Your Children," was my prayer.

I calmly walked over to Laura and asked her if she was happy. She said no. I said to her, "You have the swing you want, but you are not happy because your friend is unhappy. Wouldn't you like to be happy together?" She sadly nodded yes. I continued, "When you share, your heart gets bigger and bigger and bigger and you feel happy. But when you don't share, your heart feels really, really small and you are sad. Wouldn't you like to share and make your heart big and happy?" She nodded yes. By this time Jeffrey was back at the swings listening too. He wanted to make his heart big as well. Laura did share, and then Jeffrey shared. Peace again settled on the playground.

"Call forth in everyone only the remembrance of God, and of the Heaven that is in him. For where you would have your brother be, there will you think you are. Hear not his appeal to hell and littleness, but only his call for Heaven and greatness." (T309)

We all need to be reminded of who we truly are, no matter our age. We all have the potential to live and play in love and peace. We can all get along on the great playground of life. And getting along does not mean we are giving in or losing. Getting along means we are sharing and joining. What good is it to have everything if you are alone and unhappy? I saw this so clearly with Jeffrey's friend Laura. She had what she wanted, she had won, but she was not happy because she was alone.

A Course in Miracles says,

"The holy instant is the Holy Spirit's most useful learning device for teaching you love's meaning." This is so because its purpose is to help us suspend our judgment of a situation so that we might see what is truly happening. To look past the seeming rights and wrongs and look with a healed perception on this moment. The Course tells us that the holy instant "becomes a lesson in how to hold all of your brothers in your mind, experiencing not loss but completion. From this it follows you can only give. And this is love, for this alone is natural under the laws of God." (T315)

How are you playing on your playground? Has peace found a home in your heart? Are you choosing to be happy and experience a holy instant of release or are you caught in your rightness and a world of judgments?

It seems scary to us to have faith, turn to God, and let go of our investment in the outcome of our life situations in this world. But remember God is not asking you to sacrifice the world or your life, only the investment you hold on it. We think that if we let go of our investment we would lose, but we are assured in the Course that is not the case:

"You are afraid of this [releasing your investment in the world] because you believe that without the ego, all would be chaos. Yet I assure you that without the ego, all would be love." (T312)

It is time for us to stop living from a fear of littleness and loss, and start living from the magnitude of love. We are so afraid to let go of the little we have (our ego's view of the world), that we are missing the infinite experience of love that God has guaranteed us. But this is a practice. Little by little we see that releasing our investments in fear (whether it be sharing a swing or releasing our "rightness" in an argument) brings us more peace and a happier life.

But this is a process. And that is why I am so excited about this year's conference in August. We are going to be focusing on the practice of the holy instant and the gift that will bring to our lives -- learning that we do want God's Will for us and that it is possible and practical in this world. I am so excited about the speakers we have assembled and especially the opportunity we have to listen and learn from Jerry Jampolsky -- a man who has truly realized the value of choosing to live in the holy instant. His work with attitudinal healing -- which is based on his study of the Course -- has transformed the minds of thousands around the world on the concept of healing and death. His original work with children with catastrophic illnesses was groundbreaking. He showed that healing was of the mind. The wisdom of those children he worked with who were able to release their bodies in peace because they knew that they were not their bodies became a step in faith that helps us all.

We all need to practice our willingness to live from love, to practice the holy instant. We need to join together in support and community. We have been told in the Course that there is a celestial speed up going on in this world and that teachers of God are needed now more than ever before. We need to do our part to heal this world by healing our lives, so I hope you will join me in August, for I know "we go together, you and I." (SP7)

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Looking at Distractions

The other day I went to the grocery store, but I forgot my list. Well, it wasn't a very long list so I should be able to remember it, I thought. But when I went into the store there were such great decorations all around for the holidays, some super special sales, and some much needed items that I didn't know I needed until I saw them. When I got home, with my car full of all my "needed" items, of course I had missed a few items on my list that was sitting on the kitchen counter where I had left it. Nothing too important, just the staples like: milk, butter, bread.

I was a little upset with myself. How could I get so distracted? I pride myself on being a self-thinker. Am I really that influenced by mass marketing? Or am I really that forgetful? The temptation to beat myself up was, well, tempting! It was also just as tempting to project my blame onto the store, the seductive world of marketing, and the fact that with age comes loss of memory cells. But the interesting thing was that none of those projections, the ones toward myself or the world, gave me the things I forgot. If I wanted to get my milk, butter, bread, etc., I needed to get into my car and go back to the store. I simply made a mistake, I forgot, and all my angry projections would not solve the problem. It would just delay my inevitable trip back to the grocery store and make me miserable.

It occurred to me that this is exactly how my ego wants me to think about the distractions of the world. It wants me to be so distracted by the distractions that I will never see the easy solution that lies before me. The Course reminds us...

"The distractions of the ego may seem to interfere with your learning, but the ego has no power to distract you unless you give it the power to do so. The ego's voice is an hallucination. You cannot expect it to say "I am not real." Yet you are not asked to dispel your hallucinations alone. You are merely asked to evaluate them in terms of their results to you. If you do not want them on the basis of loss of peace, they will be removed from your mind for you." (T138)

It is my choice to be distracted. The distraction may come in the form of me blaming myself, the past, the world or a myriad of things that seem to be beyond my ability to control. My goal is not to control my distractions but rather to look at them for what they are: a choice for pain instead of peace. They cannot stop me from experiencing a life of peace and joy unless I give them a power that they (being hallucinations) do not really have. No matter how real those distractions seem to us, they cannot stop us from the fulfilled life that God is holding out for us.

The Course tells us, "The past is over. It can touch me not." (W442) It is from our thoughts about the past that the power of our distractions come. The ghosts of our past seem to have a powerful ability to stop us from the blessings of our lives now. I am reminded of the holiday classic by Charles Dickens, A Christmas Carol. It is the story of a man named Scrooge, a bitter, angry person who feels justified in his hateful nature because of his painful past and the world it causes him to see all around. But when he looks at the distractions of life (his past and his actions) with the help of a few ghosts (perhaps they could be called "Holy Spooks"), the process of healing begins. He sees with a new "lighted" vision the world around him now.

We are asked to let the healing begin. We are not asked to deny our past or the distractions they bring us in our lives. We are asked to look directly at them and see that they have no power over us except the power we give them to distract us from the peace of God right now in our lives.

The Course tells us that the sign of Christmas is a star, a light in darkness. It asks us to see that light as not outside of us but shining in the darkness within our own minds, and to let that be an awareness that the time of Christ is now. The time for our healing is now -- not some time in the future when we understand the Course better or when we finish our workbook lessons -- right now. We are asked to look at or to shine a little light on all those dark, distracting thoughts from the past, and to see that our healing will not come by changing anything in the world, but by changing our minds about the world and its purpose. (T327 paraphrased)

As I have quoted many times from the Course, the purpose of the world is to heal God's Son (that's each one of us). That is the only purpose the Holy Spirit sees in the world and therefore the only purpose it has. See another purpose for the world and you are distracted. You will therefore give the world a power it does not have and you "will not escape its laws of violence and death." (T512) Not because the laws of violence and death are real to God, but because you will believe they are real and therefore they will have power over you.

The world is here right now. We believe in the laws of violence and death. We have made a mistake about the world and its purpose; we need to correct our thinking. Looking at the darkness of our past may be a painful experience. No one wants to look at his or her mistakes. But we are not looking at our mistakes so that we can get stuck in the shame and guilt, but so we can be healed. Let's not get distracted and believe the hallucinations of the ego are real. Let us look with God and see His miracle.

Einstein said, "No problem can be solved from the same consciousness that created it. We must learn to see the world anew." We can do this now. Let us not be distracted. We have the formula; let's put it to the test. Look directly on what is causing you pain, sadness or anxiety. Perhaps you don't even know what it is that is causing you the upset. That does not matter, just be willing to look at the unrest, the unhappy feelings in your life and invite God's Answer in. You want to use this world for its purpose: to heal the Son of God. You are willing to do your part and look -- you will not be distracted. And, then you will let God do His part. Healing is not your job; your job is to let the healing presence that is in you now come forth.

This is the time of our rebirth -- for ourselves and the world. We can do it. After all, we are being assured of it: "This is the time in which a new year will soon be born from the time of Christ. I have perfect faith in you to do all that you would accomplish. Nothing will be lacking, and you will make complete and not destroy." (T329) "You do not walk alone. God's angels hover near and all about. His Love surrounds you, and of this be sure; that I will never leave you comfortless." (W488) It is now time to enter this new year, this new moment with His perfect faith in you, the knowledge that you are holy and complete, and the awareness that you are surrounded by the Love of God. With this holy "shopping list," your distractions are doomed!

Blessings for a peace-filled, distraction-less holiday!

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